Below Zero
by Lonelygoatherd
Summary: Jamie's feelings for Jack Frost are twisted and jumbled. Bennefrost. Not sure what path this fic will take c:


_The first fall of snow is not only an event, it is a magical event. You go to bed in one kind of a world and wake up in another quite different, and if this is not enchantment then where is it to be found?_  
_-J. B. Priestley_

He met Jack Frost when he was eight years old.

He met Jack Frost when his festering doubts almost won and destroyed the Guardians. But he made Jamie believe again, made him see the legends that everyone was so intent on disproving. He gave him hope, wonder, fun, excitement, and a reason to hold on to childhood. The name Jack Frost became synonymous with good times and laughter. The night his childhood stories came true is one Jamie has clung to often, and relives when he feels upset, or sad, or anxious.

He's been doing that too much as of late. Being sixteen is one of the many overlooked challenges of our world. Having to grow up and "be a man", leave behind your fairy tales and toys for relationships and driving cars. While everyone else has been slowly adjusting to these changes, "maturing", Jamie has not. Loyalty to his Guardians, fear of leaving behind his childhood, and terrified of losing his belief in Jack Frost are things that have left Jamie feeling isolated, feeling confused, and feeling left behind.

His old friends slowly stopped believing. Whether by choice or not, Jamie didn't realize, on that amazingly cold, magical night, that the others would soon grow to care more about grown-up things, about clothes and relationships and jobs, than they did about Santa. About the Tooth Fairy. About all the magical beings Jamie trusted with his life. He didn't know that he would be picked on for days on end when, at thirteen, he revealed that he was upset about losing his last tooth, because he didn't want the fairies to stop visiting him. He though his old friends would stick up for him, tell the older kids that _yes_, the Sand Man and the Easter Bunny and _all_ of them are _real_, but they didn't. They were the first to laugh and call him horrible names. Another thing Jamie had grown accustomed to.

But even though they no longer believed, Jamie still had the Guardians to count on. Often busy with collecting teeth or painting eggs, Jamie saw them every once in a while. Sandy would peek into his window some nights, give him a wave, and be off. Whenever one of Tooth's fairies had a tooth to collect that was near his home, they'd make sure to stop by and say hello for her. North and Bunny would always wake him up to say hello on their respective holidays, and Jack would always conjure up a snow day for him when he asked. These were the moments Jamie counted on. These short encounters that left him feeling happy and reassured.

Especially when he spent time with Jack.

Jamie can never get enough time with him; sledding and throwing snowballs and ice skating. He feels more alive, feels more like himself, when he's with Jack. Saying goodbye to him is one of the hardest things he does, and they become more difficult with each visit. But the dreams he has of Jack, the strength to get through each day that he draws from thinking about Jack, these are things Jamie relies on when he feels like dying at school, feels lost at home, and feels confused about too much. They are a source of comfort.

But they also scare him. Jack Frost has been his best friend since he was eight years old. Jamie could tell him anything, ask for advice, and listen to his tales. Any problem felt minuscule once Jack conjured up a solution, any dream reachable. Was he supposed to have these, these _feelings_ for him? Was he allowed to? And even if he did allow himself to explore them, were they simply the admiration one has for their childhood companion, or were they more intense than that? For more than a year now, Jamie's been battling the emotionally charged confusion in his head, and all alone, at that. He could talk about anything with Jack Frost, except his feelings for Jack Frost.

* * *

It's a sunny August morning. Sandy hasn't visited in a few weeks. It's been four months since Jamie has seen Bunny, three since Tooth or one of her fairies came around, and four until he knows North will drop by.

But Jack hasn't visited since February. Jamie knows he avoids places that are affected by the summer heat, so he doesn't feel upset. At least, he always tries not to. Thousands, millions of children in the world, and the amount of visits he's gotten from his friends are more than anyone would ever ask for. Jamie knows that he can't expect them to favor him over any other child, can't visit him every time Jamie feels upset or lonely or doubtful. He tries not to feel selfish, doesn't bother the Guardians with how the other children stopped believing, how they make him feel so small for still believing, or how he sometimes feels too old to believe anymore. Even Tooth remarked on it, when Sophie lost one of her teeth and she made a special trip to see them, how Jamie could still believe when others were long passed doing so. She meant it kindly, he knew that, but it made him feel foolish.

Jack never makes him feel foolish, however. As Jamie grew up, so did their conversation. When Jack reappeared in Jamie's life almost a year after their acquaintance, he found almost the same boy that he left behind. Hopeful and full of childish wonder. As time went on, and Jamie found himself feeling more isolated from everyone, Jack was really, truly, the only one that understood. The other Guardians were still a source of comfort, but only with their presence. Jack's stories of how isolated he felt, when nobody could see him, hear him, _knew_ of him, are what made him closer to Jack than any of the others. The bond strengthened with each night Jack spent telling Jamie how cynical and disappointing those who taunted him were, how Jamie was a prime example of the goodness that prevails when one keeps their hope alive, that growing up didn't mean losing belief.

_These are the things that have made Jamie think he has fallen in love with him._


End file.
